And here we go...

A billion dollars to join DJT’s exclusive new scam, The Board of Peace, and there isn’t even a pickleball court. I have decided to get in on the action, announcing my own exclusive club, The Peace Club. We do happen to have a pickleball court, exercise bikes, multiple Stairmasters, and even a spin class for the ladies. Please send fifty dollars, cash only, in care of this website and, in less than two weeks, I will send you the location of your nearest 24-Hour Fitness. When entering, just tell them that you are a member in good standing of the Peace Club and they will let you in. Offer good only on Sundays after 4 pm. Please, no guests.
Well, so what else is going on in the news? Oh, yeah — the NEW American Civil War is now in its opening days to mostly bad reviews. On the road tryouts are currently in Minnesota but Trump promises to bring it to your town soon. Fox News has declared it a “Masterpiece” and says, “It could possibly run forever.” 
Yes, it seems American citizens are not free to wander freely in Minnesota without danger of being shot multiple times in the face by masked fascists — or at least, federal immigration enforcement agents have recently been involved in fatal shootings in Minneapolis, sparking protests and intense political conflict. On January 24, 2026, federal agents fatally shot a 37-year-old Minneapolis resident named Alex Pretti during an enforcement action, and that followed the controversial January 7 shooting of Renée Good by an ICE agent. These incidents have prompted widespread protests, criticism of federal tactics, and calls for investigations from local leaders, while federal authorities maintain they were acting in self-defense. 
I have 9 months until Martial Law on the brackets. What's your bet?
Just a note: Remember, Dick’s no longer sells weapons to protect yourselves so I am afraid you may have to go elsewhere. My advice is to follow the advice of the Viet Cong and begin building some tunnels. Think of it as some sort of hellish game, a real-life Minecraft that none of us will be escaping from anytime soon.
Good luck, stay safe, and remember we are only 283 days, 6,792 hours, and 407,520 minutes away. For God’s sake, mark it in your calendars and make sure you are there. Oh, yes — be prepared to stand in line.

Your times may vary depending on when you’re reading this and what time zone you are in.
Stay safe, America!