J.P. Linde
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J.P. Linde

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Visionary Talent Agency
visionarytalentagency.com
323-890-6160 phone
betsymagee@visionarytalentagency.com
Beverly Hills, CA   90210
1995: AROUND TOWN - KOIN TV (Portland Oregon)
In my brief 3 months as Entertainment Reporter, I won 16 Emmys and three Pulitzer Prizes.
You can now gift the entire J.P. Linde collection of novels and films. “SON OF RAVAGE,” “THE HOLOGRAPHIC DETECTIVE AGENCY” and, of course, the campy horror film classic “AXE TO GRIND.” All three make excellent gifts. And while you’re at it, add a couple of J.P. Linde COMEDY CLUB NETWORK appearances to your digital library. You can find all of my appearances on Amazon Prime at a very affordable price. Give the gift that will keep on giving. Get your J.P. Linde Media Bundle today!

“The most frequent side effects associated with the J.P. Linde Media Bundle are tachycardia, blurred vision, abdominal pain, and diarrhea. Decreases in appetite and rash/pruitus are also common. Those patients purchasing the J.P. Linde Media Bundle are at risk for developing extrapyramidal symptoms, including dystonia, parkinsonism, and restlessness, in addition to neuroleptic malignant syndrome and tardive dyskinesia. In some cases, The J.P. Linde Media Bundle can cause hyperprolactinemia, orthostatic hypotension, leucopenia, seizures, and the potential for suicide. As with most atypical antipsychotics, metabolic changes such as weight gain and hyperglycemia are also possible”

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A Picture Worth a Thousand Passes (Zoom Pitches)

8/7/2021

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First and foremost, nobody caught me masturbating, so let’s just consider that a win. Sorry, I couldn’t help myself. But what kind of wanker whips it out during a staff meeting? Oh yeah, I remember, a New Yorker columnist.
 
Not only are we entering a new chapter of the pandemic, but discovering new ways of pitching our work through the, as Henry Rollins is fond of referring to it, internets. Ask anyone who knows me; I am not all that fluent in Zoom. For the record, I prefer skywriting or good ol’ fashioned smoke signals as a way to get my ideas out there.
 
At this juncture of my life, I not only have a face for radio but an entire essence best suited for poorly recorded podcasts. I possess the chicken neck of Roger Moore in A View to a Kill, the voice of Nick Nolte, in anything, and the jowls and general physique of Orson Welles hanging out a supermarket at all hours shopping for the best price in expired whole rotisserie chickens.
 
Not that I am any good at in-person pitches. I once had a pitch that went precisely as long as the logline. Oh, I hear you say, it could not have gone that bad. Oh, yes, it could. 
 
Other than all that, the Zoom pitch went exceptionally well, and I have to say it was because of the people I was lucky enough to meet with. They smiled at my lame attempts at humor and even chuckled at my timely reference to Paul Revere and the Raiders. It must have been the work itself because I was enthusiastically nervous, even going so far as to end it by assuring all in attendance that I was a team player and would do whatever it takes to make the project work for both the NY Production Company and the audience as well.
 
I have never pitched after a company had read my work, which threw me off my game at the very beginning. So, we ended up talking about my inspirations and the lead character. I stammered. I stumbled, but all with a smile on my face. I repeated that it was an underdog story (whatever the hell that means), and it all ended with a promise to follow up in a few weeks.
 
Their exact words were, “we are going to keep the script a few more weeks and talk about it.” I could tell the development team likes it, and the owner wanted to see the script after the initial email pitch. I guess it is up to the screenplay god’s now.
 
I will keep you posted.

(And now a few words from Rockwell.
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     ​In 1981, J.P. Linde co-wrote and appeared in a one-man comedy show titled “Casually Insane.”  Shortly after, he joined the ranks of stand-up comedy and performed in clubs and colleges throughout the United States and Canada.  In 1989, he made his national television debut on “Showtime’s Comedy Club Network.”  He wrote the libretto for the musical comedy “Wild Space A Go Go” and co-wrote and co-produced the feature motion picture, “Axe to Grind.”  “Son of Ravage” is his second novel.

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