Brushes with Greatness: The Olsen Twins pt 2

​When crafting a modern classic, it is imperative that you seek out what has worked before and capitalize. I am no slouch in the “capitalizing” department, so I went to who I considered the masters of this special craft, Abbot and Costello and The Three Stooges. For example, who would have dreamed that a teaming of three famous knuckleheads and the son of a Greek God? Of course, I am referring to the modern masterpiece, Three Stooges meet Hercules. However, you are not always guaranteed success when you attempt such a tried and true formula. One need no go further than the ill-timed Laurel and Hardy meet the Mummy, starring none other than Balki himself, Bronson Pinchot, or the celebrity pairings of the cast of Scooby Doo and practically everybody to learn that such pairings do not always work. No, you are playing with the fire of the gods and it is imperative that you tread carefully.
 
So, where did we leave off last week. I’ve just moved down to Hermosa Beach, I’ve barely had time to unpack my belongings and I have my first assignment, come up with an idea for identical twin/tween superstars. I don’t know about you but when I am faced with such a daunting task, I may first require the aid of a stiff drink or the calming effects of a certain botanical. No such luck, the cupboards were literally bare. At least I had the aid of a pack of Marlboro “apples and that should get through at least two ideas.
 
Then it hit me link a ton of bricks. I must go way back and literally consult the masters. The answer would be there. My answer was in the old The Patty Duke Show. Patty and Kathy, mistaken identity and always fighting over the same boy. Why it was practically an American stable of television teen fiction. But it still needed a twist as modern Hollywood has long since forgotten the virtues of classic television of Patty Duke. But I was determined. All I needed was that special something to make it truly special. What if the cute tween boy was from outer space, cast adrift much like Spielberg’s poor, withered extraterrestrial and the two girls are his only hope of getting home.  
 
I furiously wrote down my pitch, one page, all three acts and faxed it over. I was starving and headed out a place in Redondo where the Duke himself, John Wayne, used to stop for eggs. When I got back, I had a message. The partners at Green Epstein loved the pitch and were passing it along. Now, all I had to do was wait…and maybe do some grocery shopping.
 
What? They passed? Did those little twin crotch droppings even know what they were passing on? Turned out it wasn’t me or my potentially award-winning synopsis. The deal had already been made and the powers that be behind the twins had already decided it was time to move on. But, hey, if you’ve read my blog, you know it’s not like this sort of thing hasn’t happened before. 
 
It’s not like there won’t be other prepubescent twins that will need stories, right?  
 
Here endeth this week’s blog post.
 

We lost a great actress this week, who also happened to be  every boy’s sixties dream of the perfect girl. She was so much more than Emma Peel, she also happened to be Tracy Bond, Edwina Lionheart, Barbara Drummond along with countless other roles in movies, television and her beloved theatre. Woman admired her, men loved her, and we will all miss her.
 
Dame Diana Rigg 
July 20. 1938 – September 10, 2020
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“The opportunity to be bizarre - I am bizarre, aren't I? - is just so wonderful, isn't it?” – Dame Diana Rigg