J.P. Linde
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J.P. Linde
Writer
Thanks for stopping by. This site is a quick look at who I am, what I write, and the worlds I build. Browse around, check out the projects, and make yourself at home — the stories are just getting started.
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​J.P. Linde’s love of storytelling began unexpectedly in the sixth grade, when he convinced his male classmates that Elizabeth Montgomery — yes, the star of Bewitched — was his girlfriend. From that moment on, he’s been spinning stories people actually believe.
He’s performed in summer-stock productions of Our Town, Hot L Baltimore, and The Misanthrope — and, to everyone’s relief, managed to avoid appearing nude in Hair. One of the founding members of Portland, Oregon’s comedy scene, J.P. created the sketch and improv group No Prisoners and later took the stage with his one-person show, Casually Insane. He went on to perform stand-up professionally, making his national television debut on Showtime’s Comedy Club Network.
His original musical, Wild Space A Go Go, premiered in Portland at The Embers in 2011. Since then, he’s written five novels, including his latest, The Last Argonaut, coming soon from Reese Unlimited. On the screen side, he co-wrote the horror cult classic Axe to Grind and has collaborated with some of the top producers in film and television.
NEWS FLASH: This just in!
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BEST PULP NOVEL NOMINEE 2025
Flights of the Peregrine: The Last Argonaut

Also available:

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Where laughter meets terror, one story at a time.  Tales From the Chair!  The new comedy/horror anthology by J.P. Linde.  
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“Wry, weird, and uncomfortably human. Linde’s chair creaks under the weight of our collective nightmares.”

From Reese Unlimited
The Last Argonaut
by
J,P. Linde


​​When Nazi occultists awaken the vengeful spirit of Medea in their hunt for the Golden Fleece, the battle for world domination leaps from ancient tombs to wartime America. Standing in their way is The Peregrine—Atlanta’s masked avenger—and his daring wife, Evelyn. Together they’ll face dark magic, mystic assassins, and a prophecy written in blood. From the mean  streets of Atlanta to deep below Mount Olympus, The Last Argonaut hurtles through myth and history toward an explosive showdown between gods, monsters, and men—and the one hero destined to stand against them all.
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From J.P. Linde Media and El Dorado Press:

A desperate Wyatt Earp pursues Jack London, a boy, and a
grizzled mountain man in a race for a legendary gold mine


Fool's Gold 

The new novel from J.P. Linde
"Not only is J.P. Linde's FOOL's GOLD a barn burner of a snow western adventure tale, it's also a love story. Linde clearly loves his genre, loves creating within it and loves to keep his readers on the edge of their seat."    Richard Melo (Author of Happy Talk and Jokerman 8).
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Coming Soon:

NOIR
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 (A feature screenplay in development )
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Visionary Talent Agency
Betsy Magee (Agent)
​646-637-6044
[email protected]
Pitch materials are available upon request. Please contact me for access credentials.
anewtypeofhero.blogspot.com

Film Budgeting for Morons

6/4/2022

0 Comments

 
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(Pictured: partial budget from unmade Touristers 2008)
 
Have you ever written up an Independent Film Budget? Do you even want to? Trust me, I have no idea what I am doing, and I tried it. It is more frustrating than golf and only three times more exerting than attempting an IRS 10-40 long form (with deductions and additional income of course).
 
For the record, I must admit to having no idea what anything costs to buy, rent, or barter. Every figure was either taken from the internet or my imagination, so we just must assume that they are wrong. To make it even more challenging, I have no idea of how to set up my Excel sheet. But did that stop me? Hell no. I charged in any way.
 
So just for shits and giggles, let’s assume that this is a low budget horror comedy. Let’s also assume that only two of the actors have any sort of Hollywood career and that the rest are going to be kidnapped from local community theaters. Let also assume the same about the crew. DP a minor league pro, the rest lured to the job with the promise of fame, the hardship of 12-hour days and the faint wisp of enough cash to perhaps purchase a 32-inch flat-screen television from Walmart. Insurance and such have not been figured out as yet because, hey, I don’t know what the hell I am doing.
 
Still, I press on. My above the line costs (without writer/director and producer fees) are coming in around $75,000.00. The rest I have at roughly $80,000.00.  This is all based on 10-to-12-hour days with a two-week shooting schedule. Maybe I should have budgeted for more cocaine.
 
So, let’s bring this slow moving, overloaded, broken-down train to the station. What does this all mean. Well, in 2022 can a low budget film still come in at under $250,000.00. Where will this money come from? I certainly don’t have it. Do you? 
 
I am not sure if this little story will be ongoing or not. We shall have to see. In the meantime, take some time out for yourself and carve out an independent film budget. I swear, it will make you feel like a real Robert Evans.
 
“The only way you can make a deal is if you’re ready to blow it.” – Robert Evans
 
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