J.P. Linde
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J.P. Linde

Writer
J.P. on "STOP ME IF I'VE HEARD THIS" 04/13/20
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1995: AROUND TOWN - KOIN TV (Portland Oregon)
In my brief 3 months as Entertainment Reporter, I won 16 Emmys and three Pulitzer Prizes.
You can now gift the entire J.P. Linde collection of novels and films. “SON OF RAVAGE,” “THE HOLOGRAPHIC DETECTIVE AGENCY” and, of course, the campy horror film classic “AXE TO GRIND.” All three make excellent gifts. And while you’re at it, add a couple of J.P. Linde COMEDY CLUB NETWORK appearances to your digital library. You can find all of my appearances on Amazon Prime at a very affordable price. Give the gift that will keep on giving. Get your J.P. Linde Media Bundle today!

“The most frequent side effects associated with the J.P. Linde Media Bundle are tachycardia, blurred vision, abdominal pain, and diarrhea. Decreases in appetite and rash/pruitus are also common. Those patients purchasing the J.P. Linde Media Bundle are at risk for developing extrapyramidal symptoms, including dystonia, parkinsonism, and restlessness, in addition to neuroleptic malignant syndrome and tardive dyskinesia. In some cases, The J.P. Linde Media Bundle can cause hyperprolactinemia, orthostatic hypotension, leucopenia, seizures, and the potential for suicide. As with most atypical antipsychotics, metabolic changes such as weight gain and hyperglycemia are also possible”

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Me: The Lesser Known Works

4/15/2022

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(1967 (L to R) J.P. Linde, Mark Smith and David Bryce in classic 6th grade western The Good, the Bad and the Ugly. It had been less than a year since Leone released his vision but at 13, I thought it was high time for a reimagining.)


Suffice to say, most of you know me as the non-award-winning author The Holographic Detective Agency, Son of Ravage and of course the little seen cult classic Axe to Grind. But there is more to my resume than these, and I am not referring to the vast treasure drove of literary masterpieces that have not had the benefit of seeing the light of day.
 
Like all great artists/writers, I had an “early period.” For me that period was between the years 1966 and 1969, between 12 and 15 years of age. In an effort to document these major works for posterity, I have created a detailed catalog of those lost pieces and provided a brief synopsis for each.
 
Man from U.N.C.L.E. (School Play, 1966). Based on the NBC series from Arena Productions and used without permission the play had a total running time of at least five minutes, featuring several male classmates. I played Ilia Kuryakin as I owned a turtleneck. One major fight scene with no female cast members.
 
Man from U.N.C.L.E: The Sequel Affair (School Play 1966). Based on the popularity of the initial outing, a sequel was written. We were lucky enough to have all the original cast return, although there were last minute salary negotiations for a kid named Mark who played Napoleon Solo. Again, the running time was just over five minutes and again, there were no female cast members.
 
Good, Bad and the Ugly, (8mm film 1967) Based on the Sergio Leone western and starring myself (Blondie), Mark Smith (Tuco), David Bryce (Angel Eyes). Paul Bryce and Mike Smith played all of the supporting roles. Running time 12 minutes and filmed on location in the Mount Hood National Forest.  An historic sidenote: A handwritten invitation to the film premiere was sent to esteemed actor (and star of the original) Eli Wallach, who sent a very nice typewritten letter declining the event. The film was first screened for a small but adoring public in the Linde Garage at 8730 NE Tillamook.
 
(There were other 8mm films that sadly never saw a release date. Among them, Untitled Sherlock Holmes, Krakatoa West of Java, Untitled Secret Agent Film and a homage to Fantastic Journey (filmed with the aid of a lava lamp and a Aurora model of the Flying Sub from Voyage to the Bottom of the Sea). Sadly filming was stopped on Fantastic Voyage when the model sunk in our above ground swimming pool.
 
And finally, there was:
 
Bewitched (The Spec Script) 1969. Not only was this based on the popular comedy of the time, but it also happened to be inspired mostly by my unrequited love for Elizabeth Montgomery. Like my love, the script was considered a solid pass and to this day, I will never know if it is because of content, character arc, dialogue or the fact that it was written on notebook paper with a Bic pen. 
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     ​In 1981, J.P. Linde co-wrote and appeared in a one-man comedy show titled “Casually Insane.”  Shortly after, he joined the ranks of stand-up comedy and performed in clubs and colleges throughout the United States and Canada.  In 1989, he made his national television debut on “Showtime’s Comedy Club Network.”  He wrote the libretto for the musical comedy “Wild Space A Go Go” and co-wrote and co-produced the feature motion picture, “Axe to Grind.”  “Son of Ravage” is his second novel.

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