J.P. Linde
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J.P. Linde

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Visionary Talent Agency
visionarytalentagency.com
323-890-6160 phone
betsymagee@visionarytalentagency.com
Beverly Hills, CA   90210
1995: AROUND TOWN - KOIN TV (Portland Oregon)
In my brief 3 months as Entertainment Reporter, I won 16 Emmys and three Pulitzer Prizes.
You can now gift the entire J.P. Linde collection of novels and films. “SON OF RAVAGE,” “THE HOLOGRAPHIC DETECTIVE AGENCY” and, of course, the campy horror film classic “AXE TO GRIND.” All three make excellent gifts. And while you’re at it, add a couple of J.P. Linde COMEDY CLUB NETWORK appearances to your digital library. You can find all of my appearances on Amazon Prime at a very affordable price. Give the gift that will keep on giving. Get your J.P. Linde Media Bundle today!

“The most frequent side effects associated with the J.P. Linde Media Bundle are tachycardia, blurred vision, abdominal pain, and diarrhea. Decreases in appetite and rash/pruitus are also common. Those patients purchasing the J.P. Linde Media Bundle are at risk for developing extrapyramidal symptoms, including dystonia, parkinsonism, and restlessness, in addition to neuroleptic malignant syndrome and tardive dyskinesia. In some cases, The J.P. Linde Media Bundle can cause hyperprolactinemia, orthostatic hypotension, leucopenia, seizures, and the potential for suicide. As with most atypical antipsychotics, metabolic changes such as weight gain and hyperglycemia are also possible”

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One slightly Used Giant Jewish Space Laser. Must Move Quickly

1/30/2021

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Just when you thought we couldn’t get any dumber, this happens. 

A quote from Marjorie Taylor Greene:
 
"Oddly there are all these people who have said they saw what looked like lasers or blue beams of light causing the fires."
 
And what powers these mysterious space cannons?
 
“Space solar generators."
 
Run by?
 
"Rothschild Inc, international investment banking firm."
 
Who happens to be currently on the board of PG&E.
 
Wow. And I thought the My Crack and Pillow Guy was out of his mind. Seems like a majority of the Republican Party is currently neck deep in the works of Carlos Castaneda. And this appears to be just the beginning. 
 
Fellow Lizard People, here is a list of coming Q Anon conspiracy theories. Be sure and mark your calendars as some of these predictions are literally just around the corner.
 
  • The Uncle Sam billboard in Chehalis, Washington will be registered as a national landmark and become new mecca for the American Nazi Party, the KKK and the upper management of a popular chicken establishment.
  •  Jewish Space Lasers will one day be as affordable as hybrid cars, automatic garage door openers and jet packs.
  • The term “Lizard people” will be added to all American history textbooks.
  • Covid-19 will eventually be eradicated with liberal use of non-scented Febreze. 
  • Mortgage rates will soon fall below 2% and “the Jews” will buy all your stuff.
  • Disney will remove Trump from Florida’s Hall of Presidents, replacing him with Ernst Stavro Blofeld and his cat.
  • Star Trek: The Motion Picture/The Directors’ Cut will finally be released on Blu Ray.
  • In what will eventually be categorized as a miracle, Kirk Cameron will mount a comeback in movies, replacing Willie Aames in the long, anticipated sequel to Zapped.
  • Scott Sanford will finally win an Academy Award for best original screenplay.
  • Lindsey Graham will be the very special guest in season 30 of Dancing with the Stars.

Well, there you have it. Perilous times indeed. If you do encounter either a Space Laser or a lizard person, do not hesitate to call Mar-a-lago at 561 832 2600. Be sure and tell them, The Visitors sent you.
 
And now, for your entertainment pleasure, a democrat has a snack:
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     ​In 1981, J.P. Linde co-wrote and appeared in a one-man comedy show titled “Casually Insane.”  Shortly after, he joined the ranks of stand-up comedy and performed in clubs and colleges throughout the United States and Canada.  In 1989, he made his national television debut on “Showtime’s Comedy Club Network.”  He wrote the libretto for the musical comedy “Wild Space A Go Go” and co-wrote and co-produced the feature motion picture, “Axe to Grind.”  “Son of Ravage” is his second novel.

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