J.P. Linde
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J.P. Linde

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J.P. on "STOP ME IF I'VE HEARD THIS" 04/13/20
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1995: AROUND TOWN - KOIN TV (Portland Oregon)
In my brief 3 months as Entertainment Reporter, I won 16 Emmys and three Pulitzer Prizes.
You can now gift the entire J.P. Linde collection of novels and films. “SON OF RAVAGE,” “THE HOLOGRAPHIC DETECTIVE AGENCY” and, of course, the campy horror film classic “AXE TO GRIND.” All three make excellent gifts. And while you’re at it, add a couple of J.P. Linde COMEDY CLUB NETWORK appearances to your digital library. You can find all of my appearances on Amazon Prime at a very affordable price. Give the gift that will keep on giving. Get your J.P. Linde Media Bundle today!

“The most frequent side effects associated with the J.P. Linde Media Bundle are tachycardia, blurred vision, abdominal pain, and diarrhea. Decreases in appetite and rash/pruitus are also common. Those patients purchasing the J.P. Linde Media Bundle are at risk for developing extrapyramidal symptoms, including dystonia, parkinsonism, and restlessness, in addition to neuroleptic malignant syndrome and tardive dyskinesia. In some cases, The J.P. Linde Media Bundle can cause hyperprolactinemia, orthostatic hypotension, leucopenia, seizures, and the potential for suicide. As with most atypical antipsychotics, metabolic changes such as weight gain and hyperglycemia are also possible”

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Peanuts, Crackerjacks and The Winds of War

4/8/2022

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Nothing says the start of baseball season than War in Europe. Some days I feel like I’m in the middle of a Herman Wouk novel. Or, at the very least, a television adaptation of the same starring Robert Mitchum. In the last five years, Americans have endured Donald Trump, a plague, the selling the collective souls of the entire Republican Party to ol’ Scratch, and now an escalating bloodshed in Europe. Time really does fly when life as you know it is in the shit bucket. Where in God’s name is Pug Henry when we need him?
 
At least the strike is over, and we have baseball, America’s pastime.
 
SF Giants season started on Friday with a game against the Marlins. Luckily for me, I have good Wi-Fi in both my bunker and my safe room. So, I’ll be dressed in the ol’ orange and black, in the duck and cover position, and ready for the first pitch.
 
And speaking of curve balls. As we raise the winning pennant for the National League, I will be thinking of none other than Ginni Thomas and more specifically:
 
18 USC Ch. 115: TREASON, SEDITION, AND SUBVERSIVE ACTIVITIES
From Title 18.
 
I won’t bother you with the appropriate punishment for violating this seldom utilized statute, but it is worth noting that violating this law contains a few recognizable actions of late. Including:
 
Sec.
 
2381.Treason.
2382.Misprision of treason.
2383.Rebellion or insurrection.
2384.Seditious conspiracy.
2385.Advocating overthrow of Government.
2386. Infield Fly rule
 
Okay, 2386 was a way of tying my rambling diatribe back to the subject. 

In closing: I pray for the end of a war!
 I long for real justice to those who provoked and performed treason!
 And, as my side plea,  here’s hoping that the San Francisco Giants go all the way!
 
Amen
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     ​In 1981, J.P. Linde co-wrote and appeared in a one-man comedy show titled “Casually Insane.”  Shortly after, he joined the ranks of stand-up comedy and performed in clubs and colleges throughout the United States and Canada.  In 1989, he made his national television debut on “Showtime’s Comedy Club Network.”  He wrote the libretto for the musical comedy “Wild Space A Go Go” and co-wrote and co-produced the feature motion picture, “Axe to Grind.”  “Son of Ravage” is his second novel.

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