J.P. Linde
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J.P. Linde

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J.P. on "STOP ME IF I'VE HEARD THIS" 04/13/20
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1995: AROUND TOWN - KOIN TV (Portland Oregon)
In my brief 3 months as Entertainment Reporter, I won 16 Emmys and three Pulitzer Prizes.
You can now gift the entire J.P. Linde collection of novels and films. “SON OF RAVAGE,” “THE HOLOGRAPHIC DETECTIVE AGENCY” and, of course, the campy horror film classic “AXE TO GRIND.” All three make excellent gifts. And while you’re at it, add a couple of J.P. Linde COMEDY CLUB NETWORK appearances to your digital library. You can find all of my appearances on Amazon Prime at a very affordable price. Give the gift that will keep on giving. Get your J.P. Linde Media Bundle today!

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Penguins Don't Smoke

4/22/2022

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​Just viewed The Batman and have to say, despite the almost three hours of running time, I thoroughly enjoyed it.  I do have one slight gripe and that is the mandate from DC on high that the one and only Oswald Chesterfield Cobblepot would not be allowed to use any sort of tobacco product. WTF?
 
The Penguin is in part best known for smoking cigars in the Batman comic books, but Farrell's portrayal of him does not smoke. But that was not for lack of trying on the actor's part, despite Warner Bros. ' ban on smoking in a PG-13 movie.
 
Now, I can understand a hero not being allowed a cigarette, cigar, a vape or a chew, but what the hades? A villain? This is just crazy. I mean what better way to show a character morally comprised than by witnessing him attempting to impersonate the camel, Joe Cool.
 
Tony Soprano
Tony Montana
Kingpin
Fat Tony (The Simpsons)
Xenia Onatopp (Goldeneye)
Cigarette Smoking Man (X Files)
Spike (Buffy the Vampire Slayer)
 
And of course:
 
Any tobacco chewing redneck (Any Which Way but Loose)
 
Think of the subtle nuance tobacco use adds to all these fine performances. Why think of Burgess Meredith’s own performance of The Penguin in the 1966 incarnation of Batman. The waddle and cackle would be useless without the smoldering butt in a cigarette holder jutting out between clenched teeth. 
 
Closing argument:
 
In the most recent the Batman, a corrupt city official is dispatched by having his head literally blasted off his body with the aid of an explosive device locked around his neck. Hey, DC, what kind of message are we sending the impressionable youngsters of today?  Hey, kids, heres’ a public service announcement from your friends at DC: Explosive decapitations are perfectly acceptable forms entertainment. But, stay away from those damn cancer sticks.  For god’s sake, someone could get hurt.
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     ​In 1981, J.P. Linde co-wrote and appeared in a one-man comedy show titled “Casually Insane.”  Shortly after, he joined the ranks of stand-up comedy and performed in clubs and colleges throughout the United States and Canada.  In 1989, he made his national television debut on “Showtime’s Comedy Club Network.”  He wrote the libretto for the musical comedy “Wild Space A Go Go” and co-wrote and co-produced the feature motion picture, “Axe to Grind.”  “Son of Ravage” is his second novel.

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