They Throw Staplers, Don't They?

Time Magazine's Asshole of the Year

​Just for the record, in my entire creative career, I’ve never had a stapler hurled at me. Nor have I ever had the pleasure of hearing the gentle whistling breeze of an inanimate object soaring past my ear. I consider myself fortunate that no one, Hollywood executive, ex-wife, or ex-girlfriend has ever felt the need to capture my attention in such a manner.

Consider, if you will, Scott Rudin, whose exploits are so notorious that they made a movie about it, with, of all people, Kevin Spacey. Talk about dream casting. That’s equivalent to casting disgraced General and Q Anon advocate Michael Fynn in your remake of Seven Days in May. Anyways, the celebrated antics of Rudin are legion. And no worries, if staplers are not your preferred projectile of choice, ask Rudin if he happens to be packing a Blackberry. And, if he can’t get his hands on something to throw, the two-time MVP for abuse will gladly hurl an insult or two. You know you’ve made it into the abusive hall of fame when you Goggle Hollywood assholes, and your name comes up before Harvey Weinstein.

And you do not need to hurl a stapler to win MVP. There are other forms of disrespect that do not leave bruises but can be just as harmful. I have been lucky and have not experienced any of the more egregious behavior. But I have heard the bone-chilling stories, and those are bad enough.

We will not weed out these types in one fell swoop, but bastards like Rudin are a start. And we have to start speaking up. As my friend Dan Sanders is fond of saying, witnessing, and doing nothing (aka The Speer Defense) makes you an accessory. Let’s all try and keep that in mind.

I once went into a pitch meeting, and while I was waiting for my appointment, I saw a sign hanging over the entrance to the inner offices. It did not read, “Abandon hope, all who enter here.” It simply said, “Be Kind.” Nice thought and the sentiment deserves to be hung and mounted in a few more Hollywood offices.